More about Colds and COLD

Colds:
#1: Q: What's a person with a cold's favorite kind of lunch meat?  A: Cold cuts.

#2: Q: What kind of telemarketing is done by people when they have colds?  A: Cold-calling.

#3: Knock knock.
      Who's there?
      Big Ish.
      Big Ish who?
      No thanks, I've already done that.

and, COLD:
#1: How cold is it? It's so cold, we had to chop up the piano for firewood - it gave us two cords.

#2: How cold is it?  It's colder than a tin toilet seat in the Antarctic.

#3: How cold is it?  It's colder than a brass brassier on the shady side of an iceberg.

#4: How cold is it? It's so cold I saw the Ty-D Bowl man playing ice hockey.

#5: How cold is it?  One word: Peecicles.

#6:  How cold is it?  It's so cold I saw a chicken in the yard with a cape on.

          Shalom y'all - Twyla

How Now Brown Cow

#1: Q: What does a farmer call a cow that doesn't give milk? A: An udder failure
#2: Q:What do you call cattle with a sense of humor? A: A laughing stock.
#3: Q: Why do cows wear bells around their necks? A: Because their horns don't work.
#4: Q: Does running out of a burning barn make a cow unusual? A: No; just mediem-rare.
#5: Q: Why was the cow considered a snob? A" Because she thought she was a cutlet above the rest.

My watercolor of Holsteins

#6: Q: How did cows feel when the branding iron was invented? A: They were impressed.

#7: Q: Why does a milking stool only have three legs?  A: Because the cow has the udder!

#8: Q: What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?  A: Milk of Amnesia

#9: Q: What do you call the spots on black and white cows?  A:  Holstains.

#10: Q: Where do cows go when they want a night out?  A: To the moovies.

#11:Q: What do you call a cow that can sing?
        A: A moosician.

#12: Q: What is a moosical cow's favorite note?
        A: Beef-flat.

#13: What do Hawaiian cows wear?
        A: Moo-moos

#14: Q: What do you call a cow that has just had a baby?  A: Decalfinated.

#15: Q: How does a farmer count a herd of cattle?  A:  With a cowculator.

My miniature watercolor & ink:  "Grampa's Barn"

SHALOM   Y'ALL -

      TWYLA